October 23 - Halloween words and my twenty-year plan

So today we have a massive update, hopefully enough to make up for the fact that I haven’t posted anything new in over a week. In my defense, I did just finish midterms, which included taking the first test (I know, right? Who the hell has to take tests these days?) in years. I also struggled mightily to finish an essay for yesterday, and now every time I try to type the word “years” I accidentally type “Yeats” instead. Damn poets. I mean I was plenty lazy and all that too, but still.

Third Grade Journal – October 16, 1991
Today is Oct 16 I’m a good drawer aren’t I¹, I drew all of the picture Do you like the pictures one is a picture is a funny gun that has lots of other guns and knifes² the other picture is of some people trying to get away³

¹ – I am a good drawer, aren’t I?
² – This was something I really liked to draw in those days. I was never satisfied with the idea of a gun, I really wanted a gun (which clearly had to be quite large and unwieldy) that had all sorts of secret compartments where other guns, knives (or in this case, knifes), and bombs would come out. Imagine one of those badass cars in a James Bond movie…only a gun instead.
³ – This was a serious competitor for the honor of busiest page in history.

Third Grade Journal – October 23, 1991
Here are Here are cool Halloween words Frankenstein⁴ Dracula wolfman skelaton gillman Toilet Bowl Man (THE Strongest man on earth)!⁵ Wolferene⁶ captain American Batman Hulk Hogan⁷⁸ Andrea the giant Bobby (THE BRAIN) HEENAN Jim (the Anvil) NIEDHEART Knifes and Guns⁹
Houdini

⁴ – Or, as the drawing would remind you: Franky (the man) Stein. Also: I did actually cross out the first two words of this entry, only to write the same two words again. I...I don't know.
⁵ – Toilet Bowl Man is not mentioned at any other point in the journal, and I have no idea why I noted him or why I felt that he was the (I’m sorry, THE) strongest man on Earth. There isn’t even a picture!
⁶ – Ignoring Toilet Bowl Man, this is the point when the list starts to turn away from so-called “Halloween words.” I’m surprised, by the way, that I listed Wolverine and Captain America. I was and always have been a DC Comics guy, none of that silly Marvel Universe stuff. Pfft.
⁷ – And here’s where the list makes another turn away from the idea of Halloween.
⁸ – I was really, really fascinated with Harry Houdini when I was a child. There were two books on him in my elementary school library, and I always had at least one of them checked out at any given time. He is a pretty awesome dude.
⁹ – Yeah, like I said, I really liked knives and guns. This was a good impulse to lose.

Fourth Grade ALP Journal – October 15, 1992
Today I did all my gerful work¹⁰

¹⁰ – I’m sure you remember gerfuls. It wasn’t very interesting stuff, but I do remember that I was a week behind the other kids in ALP because I wanted to present all of my gerful stuff together. Then everyone laughed at me when I started my presentation by showing the “first level” gerful stuff that everyone else had already done. Jerks!

Fifth Grade ALP Journal – October 19, 1993
Today we played the Stock-Market Game. We started Odessey Of The Mind¹¹

¹¹ – Odyssey of the Mind was one of the best times I had as a kid, and I have very fond memories of it. I competed in the music division, and our challenges was to build instruments that we could play from outside a six-foot square. Our team won our region, but then lost at the district competition to the team who had finished second to use in regionals. If we had won we would have gone to Des Moines for the national Odyssey of the Mind (or as we called it, OM) competition. Sad.

Sixth Grade ALP Journal – October 17, 1994
FUN
Today everything was very fun and stimulating.¹²

¹² – The “FUN” that begins this entry was written on its own page. I suspect that my ALP teachers were not particularly impressed with this entry, and suggested (not unlike that meanie Mrs Robertson) that I elaborate. They got their wish (if only in terms of word count).

Sixth Grade Journal – October 17, 1994
A.L.P.¹³

¹³ – You might notice that this actually coincides with the above ALP entry. This is one of the few times when this happens. I assume there was some kind of scandal involved.

Sixth Grade Journal – October 18, 1994
Absent¹⁴

¹⁴ – I never, ever missed class until fourth grade, when near the end of the school year I had a cancelled flight coming back home from attending my cousin’s wedding and missed my first day of class. After that, I would fake being sick and ask my Mom if I could say home all the time. Kind of a slippery slope.

Sixth Grade Journal – October 19, 1994
Some things I would to do in the next 20 years¹⁵ are:
•Graduate college at Boston College or Harvard¹⁶.
•Get a good job such as a doctor¹⁷.
•Get married to ??¹⁸

¹⁵ – When I typed this, I typed “yeats.” Just thought you’d like to know. I also did really use bullet points in this entry. This list is very serious.
¹⁶ – It was a good plan, but it didn’t quite turn out. I did go to Tulane for a while after ruling out Boston College and realizing that I probably couldn’t get into Harvard (and also refusing to be one of those lames who applies to Harvard just so they can receive a rejection letter.
¹⁷ – I’ve got a $600/month job writing and proofreading features for the College of Arts & Sciences at UK, so I’m knocking on the door of that “good job such as a doctor” dream.
¹⁸ – Well on our way, buddy, well on our way. Thank the Lord we've still got five years until the twenty year deadline.