March 16, 2010 - A Valentine and Stange Lists

First, I want to say something to the beautiful, wonderful people who have been nice enough to not only read this blog but comment on the entries. I don’t know how the whole comment/response notification process works for you, but I have responded to every comment left on this blog (which is not nearly the task it sounds). I am always notified by e-mail when someone comments on my blog, but in case you are not notified when I respond to those comments (I assume you are not), I want you to know that nothing has been ignored. Hurray for everyone!

Oh, I also realized that I had been labeling entries from the spring of third grade as 1993 instead of 1992. I’m too lazy to go back and change it, so I guess the egg is on my face. Let’s pretend this never happened.

Third Grade Journal – March 16, 1992

Today’s team of the day is the Washington Bullets¹

¹ – The Washington Bullets had one of my favorite logos in sports history. It’s a true shame that they changed their name to the Wizards. It seems like no one remembers great Bullets players like Bernard King since the team pretty much doesn’t exist anymore. I can say, however, that it would be both coincidental and hilarious if the whole Gilbert Arenas incident happened on a team called the Bullets.

Sixth Grade Journal – February 14, 1995

My special valentine would be sent to the beautiful Heather Mattingly², because that is the girl I like, she is Hot³!

² – Heather Mattingly was a fifth grader who transferred to Hager at the beginning of my sixth grade year. She was the cousin of my on-again-off-again squeeze Chrissie Belprez and, sadly, the girlfriend of then-friend Evan Musseter. As you might imagine, this crush ended in heartache and unbelievable awkwardness. Through the wonders of Facebook, I have learned that she is now married and has a child.

³ – It’s times like this when I think that the best thing to come out of this blog is that I don’t feel particularly embarrassed about stuff like this. I’m growing as a person!

Sixth Grade Journal – February 15, 1995

I worry about:

1 – getting another “B” or missing assignments!⁴

2 – not memorizing my piano piece.⁵

3 – not learning my kicks in karate class.

4 – not playing better basketball.⁶

5 – someone reading my yesterday’s journal.⁷

⁴ – I’m not sure this is exciting enough to warrant an exclamation point. I worry about getting B’s! Yeah, I don’t get it.

⁵ – Even though I took piano for a long time, I don’t think I ever quite figured out that you could play a piece by reading the music and playing at the same time. I was not much of a multi-tasker in those days.

⁶ – Yeah, I was really struggling at this point. In one of the games we played at Holy Family, I shot a wide-open baseline jumper into the side of the backboard and then, after the ball came right back to me, did the exact same thing again. I guess you could say I was a little overexcited.

⁷ – I have an easy way to avoid this: don’t write about your crush in your school journal, don’t draw attention to it by coloring the page in camouflage, and don’t expect people to heed such warnings at “Top Secret” and “Do Not Enter.” Sheesh. Also, next to this entry Mrs Robertson wrote, “Sounds like you’re busy!” Dang right, teacher stalker lady.

Sixth Grade Journal – February 15, 1993

Strange habits of known people are:⁸

1 – Evan White: Silently mumbles after he talks.⁹

2 – Jordan Davis: Starts fights & passes gas.¹⁰

3 – Jenni Hill: Sucks up to everyone.¹¹

4 – Brandon Galloway: Tells sick jokes.¹²

5 – Trey Lewis: Thinks he’s awesome¹³.

⁸ – First, I’m a bit confused as to why there are two entries for this date. Second, why would a teacher give such a passive-aggressive journal topic to her sixth grade class? Third, what does “known people” mean?

⁹ – This was very true, and something that always amused me. For instance, if he asked you “What time is it?” he would follow his question by silently mouthing the phrase “What time is it?” a second time while you were responding. It still vexes me to this day.

¹⁰ – I don’t really remember the passing gas part, but I did not have a lot of positive feelings about Jordan Davis. After all, he was the villain whose family moved into the house of then-friend Nate Hausrath. We fought a lot this year, so much so that I almost got kicked off of the school patrol because of it. I have since curbed this rebellious, brawling attitude. Lucky for you.

¹¹ – I also had incredibly antagonistic feelings towards Jenni Hill at this time. She came to Hager in sixth grade and, as much as I love my fellow Hager graduates that year and as much as I hate to admit it, she was the only person who was a challenge to my position as smartest kid in class. She also sucked up to people a lot, apparently.

¹² – Brandon Galloway was something of a villain in my life for two reasons. The first reason was that his dad was the coach of our basketball team that year, and I was bumped to the bench in favor of Brandon, who was easily the worst starter on our team. The second is that once after school he punched me in the stomach (in front of our teacher in the classroom, no less), and then told Mrs Robertson that the reason I was doubled over on the ground was because he held out his fist and I ran into it. Seriously. That’s right, Brandon, I haven’t forgotten, and someday I’m going to hold out my first so you can “run into it.” Payback.

¹³ – I have no recollection of Trey Lewis, so he clearly wasn’t that awesome.