Yeah, back-to-back updates. Weird! I’ve decided to focus on bringing Annoyance back into the fold today, so I hope that you enjoy reading more about spells and dragons and daggers (God, how I loved to talk about daggers instead of just plain old knives). Savor.
Third Grade Journal –
Today is Nov 6. Lou Gerihg1 died of the Lou Gerihg2 disease two of his friends Jimmy Fox and Babe Ruth they were very good base-ball players3 THE4 END!
1 – As you might gather, I was interested in Lou Gehrig at this point in my life. I had a huge collection of baseball cards, and loved to draw pictures from the cards and transcribe statistics and biographical information in my journal. I say that as if you haven’t already figured this out.
2 – I love the multiple variations I use to butcher poor Lou Gehrig’s name. At least this time I was consistent.
3 – Just in case you wanted to know.
4 – Here “THE” is written in about size sixty font. It’s not just an end, it’s THE end. Don’t get it twisted.
BONUS ENTRY: Eighth Grade Journal –
“We’ll Get You For That!” Brad Screamed.5 “Whatever You Wuss.” Nate Said. We Flew Back To The House Only To Find That They Were Waiting For Us. “How Did You……” Miller Said. “I Have A Teleporter!” Rucinski Said. “Not For Long.” Hearne Said As He Threw A Dagger At It. The Knife Hit Right On Target6 And The Teleporter Shorted Out. Kris Tried To Get Them Out. “Noo7! You Busted The Teleporter!” Kris Yelled. Then They Slowly Started To Morph.8 Kelleman Turned Into A Short Little Freak With Two Daggers. Brad Stayed As Himself.9 Jenni Turned Into What Seemed To Be A Homeless Lady.10 Rucinski Turned Into An Old Man, With A Staff. Then Kris Shot A Bolt Out Of His Staff And Fixed The Teleporter.11 They Were Soon Gone. “What Was Weird!” Luan Said.12
5 – I’m sure you’ve gone back and read all Annoyance installments in preparation for this update. In case you haven’t, little has changed: some of my friends and I are locked in a struggle with a group of my friends who I somewhat arbitrarily made into an enemy group in a fantasy book-type setting. Recently, our dragon Blaze “slaughtered some guys” and then blew up the hut our enemies were staying. Oh, and one of my friends can turn into a mace. If you haven’t been keeping up, I apologize for hurting your brain.
6 – I always knew my friends had secret dagger throwing abilities. I just knew it.
7 – I can’t really think of a reason why you’d use “Noo!” instead of “No!” or “Nooooooooo!” I guess I wanted emphasis but not melodrama. The craft of fiction on display, folks.
8 – Morphing is a common theme in this story. I had so many interests (which you’ll eventually see) that any time I wanted to change the story, everyone would inexplicably morph into new people and be in a completely new setting with a completely new story. Hey, Alfred Hitchcock didn’t use much explication either. Eighth grade Guy was a master of his craft.
9 – I’m not sure whether this was a dig on Brad or my attempt to somehow spare him from being transformed into an unflattering character. Actually, I am sure. It was definitely the first option. Sorry Brad.
10 – Yeah, I didn’t think a lot of Jenni at this point. I’m still wondering how many of the actual “free write” entries I should use from this journal since almost all of them just rip on Jenni the entire time. We shall see.
11 – I was unaware that there were ancient spells tailored to fix intricate, technological devices from the future. You learn something every day, I guess.
12 – Say what you will, I always manage to close with something profound. Thank you, Luan.
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