April 9, 2010 - But he wears glasses like me

Third Grade Journal – March 22, 1992

Atlanta Hawks is today’s player¹ team of the day. On their team is Dominique Wilkens². His number is 21. He is very good. He has won two slam-dunk titles³.

¹ – At first this seems like a typo, but I’ll let you decide which it was supposed to be.

² – That is, Dominique Wilkins.

³ – Very true. This is an important omission from the previous entry that was more clearly dedicated to the stylings of Mr Wilkins. I mean, the guy beat both Jordan and Julius Erving in 1985, and was robbed against Spud Webb. But I’m sure you already knew that.

Third Grade Journal – March 26, 1992

Today’s team of the day is the Detroit Pistons. Isiah Thomas⁴ plays for the Pistons. His number is eleven. He is⁵

⁴ – I was all set to fix this typo, but apparently it is “Isiah” and not “Isaiah.” You don’t always see riffs on Biblical names like that.

⁵ – Another case of my former self having oh so much more to say and simply running out of space and/or time. Tragic.

Third Grade Journal – March 31, 1992

Today’s team of the day the Chicago Bulls. One of the best players is Scotty Pippen⁶. He is very good⁷. The 3rd Best Player is Horace Grant. He is good too. But He wears glasses like me⁸. The best player is Micheal⁹ Jordan he is 100% owesom¹⁰ he has won two slamdunks titles.

⁶ – That is, Scottie Pippen. Also not to be confused with Scottie Pippien.

⁷ – Whoa whoa whoa. You’re just going to mention Scottie (for a second time, no less) without mentioning his participation in the 1990 slam dunk contest? For shame. I mean I know he came in fifth place out of eight contestants, but still.

⁸ – I love the “but” here. It can only mean that I felt that Horace was somehow good in spite of his glasses. Could I have really been that self-deprecating when I was eight years old?

⁹ – That is, Michael. For the longest time the name “Michael” just looked wrong to me because I didn’t understand how you could put an “a” before an “e.” I guess I got over it.

¹⁰ – But not necessarily in the same way that Manute Bol was. In case you can’t tell by the fact that I had “player of the day” entries featuring Pippen and Grant but none featuring Jordan, I was a bit of a hater in those days. Actually, I’m pretty much still a hater now, only I’ve moved on to LeBron James.

Third Grade Journal – April 6, 1992

Today’s team of the day is the Houston Rockets. Hakeem Olajuwon¹¹ plays for them. He is first place is blocks¹². Eric “Sleepy” Floyd is very good¹³.

¹¹ – Of all the names to spell correctly. I’ll say it again: what a kid.

¹² – Olajuwon was actually second in blocks during the 1991-92 season even though he had the second highest per-game average of his career. He finished just one block behind David Robinson for the season. Pretty brutal.

¹³ – I’m not sure I knew or even knew who Eric Floyd actually was. I am sure, however, that he wasn’t “very good.” Averaging 9.1 points per game (as he did for the 1991-92 season) and getting nickname because of your penchant for falling asleep during games is not what I would call a particularly strong showing or legacy.