January 21 - Sixth Grade Bonanza (part five)

The continuing saga of updating from someone else’s computer continues. I learned earlier this week that apparently my computer is magical in that it is capable of maintaining the formatting I use in MS Word when I paste it into the blog. Other computers? Not so much. So when you read this, know that I had to put in all of the underlining, italics, and superscript by hand. The things I do for all two of you…

Sixth Grade Journal – January 13, 1994¹
I don’t understand why baseball players are on strike², why I don’t have a girlfriend, and why I need braces.³

¹ – In an example of my honesty in bringing these tales to you, I thought I’d point out that I mislabeled the year for this entry. See, I am fallible!
² – Because they are greedy, moronic SOB’s, that’s why. This really affected me as a kid.
³ – Not sure which of these two things is the reason for the “TOP SECRET” label. I mean obviously I have a guess, but inevitably the braces were far more damning. Also, maybe I was getting a little out of control with the “Stay Out” labels.

Sixth Grade Journal – January 14, 1995
A button, because a button can hold something together⁴, or if you push a button a reaction can happen⁵

⁴ – This entire entry is written in mock-italics except for the phrase “can hold something together.” Like many things in these journals, this is a complete mystery.
⁵ – Sure, all these things are true, but what kind of topic could make you write an entry about how much you like buttons? Confusing.

Sixth Grade Journal – January 18, 1995
Name of a play, a performance, a maraige⁶, or a hologram are something I would like to see on a PROSCENIUM.⁷ leather, a mirror, or lanvendar⁸, it would also be nice to see a chandlier.⁹

⁶ – If you think about it, this is probably the way it should be spelled. Maybe with two r’s, but let’s be honest, the i before a isn’t really helping anybody.
⁷ – I clearly demonstrated some understanding of this word, but I had to look it up just fifteen years later. Powerful, effective work, Mrs Robertson.
⁸ – Assuming this word is supposed to be “lavender,” I am having serious trouble discerning the meaning of the word proscenium from this entry.
⁹ – Okay okay, I caved. A proscenium is the area of a modern theatre that is located between the curtain and the orchestra. There.

Sixth Grade Journal – January 19, 1995
Today I have Hager basketball team practice at 6:00 p.m. in the Hager Elementary School¹⁰ I also have an open notes quiz in Science class today. We also have gym (P.E.) and computers in school.¹¹
gymnasium.

¹⁰ – This is particularly thorough. I didn’t just have practice, I have Hager basketball team practice, at a specific time, and in a specific place. Accuracy is important.
¹¹ – An open notes quiz, gym, and computers? How did I contain myself?

Sixth Grade Journal – January 20, 1995
Brothers and sister¹² fight a lot because they usually a really bad disagreement¹³, or the main reason is that they don’t like each other or one made the other extremely mad.¹⁴

¹² – Notice the singular “sister” here. Oh, I had two sisters alright. But I only fought with one. She might think this was funny if she ever bothered to read any of this. THANKS FOR NOTHING.
¹³ – Such a bad disagreement that I couldn’t concentrate enough to put a verb in the sentence. Furthermore, I usually a peanut butter and banana sandwich.
¹⁴ – Again, notice the lack of reciprocity in that closing statement. It’s not because they made each other mad, it’s because one of them specifically made the other mad. I wonder who made who mad?